The day started off with this. No complaints. I need the brain fuel to power through this 3000-word paper due in for Friday. My sleeping pattern has been much more erratic since essay time started a week ago; 8am became the regular bedtime, and rising at 6pm the norm. I've hated it, as lack of sun makes me incredibly depressed, but anyway. Might have fixed it today. Ended up passing out at 2pm after an all nighter (first essay got done and handed in), and then woke up incredibly disoriented at 2.30am this morning. Spent about two hours in bed watching House then finally got up at 4.30 and decided to work (it's 8am now and I have around 1,750 words of notes which is a definitive start). 6am breakfast pictured above. Morning snack will be more fruit and plenty of water, lunch will probably be sushi even though I can't afford it and for dinner I'm either going to make vegetarian bolognese (with quorn mince) or some other concoction involving the ingredients in my fridge right now. I really love the feeling of sitting at my desk reading articles, eating breakfast and drinking coffee as the sun comes up. It's very gratifying and makes you feel like part of the human race - the part that wakes up before 7am and actually gets shit done in the mornings. It's just peaceful to have that solitude before all the other students wake up. The ideal schedule would definitely involve waking up hours before everyone else, although it means getting to bed earlier. That's the one downside as I love to stay up late and sacrificing that is something I've always found always difficult.

Trying to turn my obsession with food into an obsession with healthy eating will probably be a successful way to navigate the next few weeks. I'm getting preoccupied with the arrangement of my food and how it looks aesthetically before I eat it. In general I love to cook and make food look beautiful so channelling my obsessions into this will prevent me from making bad choices. I hope.

Weighed 165.8 when I stepped on the scales at 3am. It's my absolute intention to be in the 150s by the end of next week. I'm looking forward to being able to relax, read and socialise when I get back. I isolate myself at university to the point of it being voluntary loneliness, except I never feel alone. I just feel disappointed in the other people who seem to be around, for not being interesting enough. Eventually I'm going to pickle in my own snobbery, but for now with all the work it's actually doing me some favours. I really do want to become more obsessive about my work. I'd like the title 'workaholic' to apply to me and I don't care if it makes me antisocial. Work is more fulfilling than meaningless conversation at any rate.