Miracle of God

By some miracle of God, or maybe just the laxatives I took last night, the scales read 161.8 when I woke up. I didn't gain. I'm not sure if that's a fluke or not, but I'm praying that it's not. Because if I do good today I could be 160 tomorrow, and 159 on Thursday, and so on.

I'm hoping that the promise of breaking the 150s in the next few days is enough to propel me head-first into extreme restriction mode. I'm not going out, I'm being an antisocial bitch and avoiding everyone, in part because I feel shitty about my appearance, but mostly because I can't deal with the interruption. Or the questions. Caro has made her opinion on this perfectly clear: restricting is dumb. Well, I can't be bothered to argue, so I'll just have to hide it.

-- 1/4 c. steel-cut oats (90)
-- Almond milk (25)
-- 1/4 c. raspberries (20)

Since when was 135 a scary number for a breakfast meal? Now, suddenly, terrifyingly, it seems like just a "little" too much.

Tesco sells its own brand of "courgette spaghetti" (commonly known to the rest of the world - namely America - as zucchini noodles) that is somewhere around 125 calories for the entire tub. 125 also seems like too much, now that I think about it, but I suppose it's just vegetables "shaped" into what looks like pasta. This could be invigorating and mildly panic-inducing in equal measure. I... can't remember the last time I ate an actual pasta dish that wasn't a salad.

What would one even put with such a thing? Sauce? Dressing? I have no idea. This is what happens when I "branch out" for dinner options. I overthink everything.  

I've lost ~7 lbs in 11 days. Is it unreasonable to want to ditch 10 more in the next 10? We'll see.