Vegan cyclist bullshit, part 2

Following on from yesterday's post, just did another 40 minute bike ride and now my thighs are killing me, but another 20 tomorrow and a gym workout and I know I can get addicted to this feeling. I had a banana, mint, peach and apple smoothie for breakfast, followed by a bowl of tomato pasta at 4pm. So that's around 550 calories so far, and I'm going to have some cereal now. Dinner will probably be another bowl of pasta, some fruit, and black coffee. Or rice and avocado depending on what I want.

Lina is in France so communication is infrequent and via dodgy wifi. Seeing Tina tomorrow, then we have maybe 9 or 10 days before shooting starts again. So in my mind, that's 9 or 10 days to lose 5 or 6 pounds and plummet myself back into the 150s. I'm agitated about my calories. I don't know whether to keep restricting with this vegan thing, or just allow myself to eat freely and continue to work out. I know the former will produce results, but the second option is more sustainable.      

I'm trying to write this screenplay on spec, but I literally have no idea what will become of it, whether it will even be useful. But I need a new project. Admittedly, the idea of filling my days with writing, smoothies and cycling is incredibly appealing, especially since I now know I only need sparse company to actually maintain a normal level of happiness. Writing is fulfilling and I haven't been doing much of it lately, just occasionally entertaining these brief and random creative ideas that never seem to go anywhere. So I need to get back to that. My other option is sitting on my ass watching movies until the 22nd of August, which won't do anything for me, beyond the instant gratification of being a lazy shit. No - the dream here is to be athletic, to use my body, to live my life. To write a little, sleep a little, eat enough good food to stay healthy and reap the rewards. Next year will be a dream, if all goes to plan. Finally we'll have our own space, and I can just get on with doing my thing. I wish there was a way to earn some money over the next month, but nothing looks promising. Again, living in poverty for a couple of months has its own sordid appeal, so maybe a steady diet of bananas and brown rice won't be so bad after all.

Becoming a chiselled bastard who only sleeps 6 hours a night and subsists off of green smoothies is a number one ambition of mine. The trick is entertaining myself enough that I actually want to wake up.