Just another day 0

So. 168.2 lbs on the scales today. A little gain but it's not surprising since I stayed up until literally 7am with Lina and drank. Baileys happened. So did vodka. And doughnuts. Oops. God I never eat that kind of food, but I'm sure it put my limit up to something like 2000. Ugh. Anyway...

Intake so far --

-- 2 bagels, toasted + butter (600 cals - dear God)
-- 1/2 "mean greens" green smoothie (92 cals)
-- Pita bread with hoummous (230 cals)
-- Diet coke (1 cal)
-- Cinnamon cereal with lite soy milk (180 cals)

-- (1,103)

I need to find some way to curb my addiction to carbs. It may just be the end of term situation I've found myself in, where I have very little money and all I seem to have in the cupboard is bread and cereal. I guess the bagels were somewhat of a mistake. But at least until I started recently posting again, I kind of stopped counting calories in the moment. I used to be so aware of every bite of food I put into my mouth. Over the last year I just shovelled in whatever was around and never paid much attention to quantities during the act of eating. Later on I'd clock up estimates and get freaked out at how much I'd actually consumed, but I guess a part of me just selectively forgot about it. Then I gained fifteen pounds and wound up here, so I suppose I'm paying for it in some ways now, but mostly I'm trying to forgive myself for the last year. I was pretty much a major depressive up until the recent Easter vacation, so it's no wonder calorie-counting went out the window.

It's so muggy in England. Seriously, I open the window and there's zero breeze. Then when we were walking to the supermarket to buy ingredients for waffles (not my idea) my jumper was like, sticking to my back. Anyway. A note on the waffles - I just got off the phone to my mother and now our flatmates are doing some kind of flat dinner thing with a film. I might just have half a waffle because then we're eating real food afterwards. Oh God, it's 11pm. I have got to get my shit together.

PS. Took some photos in the full-length mirror today, this was the best one. I guess the weight gain isn't as horrifically obvious as I thought it was, which is vaguely comforting. Being 5'9 does have some perks at least. Still, my tentative goal is to be back to 158 by the next round of shooting (7th July). Thunder thighs be gone.