Oh to be Eva

Oh to be Eva Green...

This afternoon I went for a short walk - no longer than 45 minutes. It was too hot to walk for longer. As I was walking along I felt like I was drifting, floating in a dream. Everything felt so dull and protracted and heady. I felt strangely numb, like nothing could touch me, but also fragile, as if the smallest sound could knock me over. I heard the distant sound of a car and it was uncomfortable.

I ended up buying an 8 pack of diet pepsi (1 calorie in each can) and 3 iced coffees from Tesco.

I find that when I'm strict with my diet, I become more organised and disciplined in other areas of my life, for example my work. I am more focused when I am in control of my food. I wish it wasn't like that, but we have to work with what we've got, right?

I know that if I stick to my plan, my quality of life will improve drastically. I'll become happier, want to go out more and concentrate better on my studies, therefore achieving more and living my life to the fullest. I will be able to wear clothes that make me feel attractive and confident, rather than drowning in oversized tops and jumpers meant for the winter, all to cover up my huge hips and horrible curvy shape. I will be able to show myself off and reach my full potential. And, I will be able to enjoy myself once school is over. Oh, and lie on a beach somewhere, smoking vogues, of course.